11/29/18- Parent Confession 4

Alright this one is a parent confession that I feel a little conflicted about-- we use Santa to encourage good choices and behavior from our son.  On the one hand, our son has always been reward centered, so encouraging him to make good choices for a visit from Santa is more effective than a time out for making a bad choice.  But on the other hand, I don't want him to think he's a bad kid when he makes a bad choice. All kids are good even when they don't make the best choices.  I believe that truly.  So I worry that my son will think he's bad when we tell him Santa won't come. Of course, we'd never not have Santa visit our house, but I still worry about Jack receiving a confusing message about Santa. 

I know some parents see Santa as lying to their kids, and I respect that. However, for me personally, I've always been a sucker for magic and hope, which is what I think Santa embodies.  Thus, I have no qualms about telling Jack about Santa-- I want him to believe in magic and hope and miracles and all the good stuff in the world.  Even when he discovers the truth about Santa, I hope (there's that word again) that he'll still believe.  I still believe in Santa and the magic Santa brings this time of year, and so I think it's important to share in the tradition of Santa that I was taught (as a kid) with my own kid. 

One tradition I didn't have with Santa and Christmas when I was a kid is the Elf on the Shelf.  Here's part 2 of the confession: I really dislike the Elf on the Shelf.  Yep, I said it out loud.  I could do without the Elf.  Although I love what Jack has named his Elf, Pizza!, the Elf is there to basically tattle tale on my kid.  I mean again, Pizza's presence is encouraging good behavior and choices, so I guess that the tattle taling isn't what I'm really annoyed with.  The part I'm most annoyed with is the tradition of having to move that sharking Elf every night.  Like I barely remember to shower some days, how am I supposed to remember to move that sharking Elf every night?!  So my solution is that Pizza just loves candy so much that he (she?) can't take themselves away from the candy bowl.  Yeah, that's it.

So there. That's my parent confession(s).  I harbor ill feelings towards the Elf on the Shelf (my husband wanted to do it, and sometimes you make compromises in relationships, haha), and well I definitely believe in sharing the tradition of Santa and the magic Santa creates this time of year, I do worry a little that our kid may get mixed messages about being a good kid vs. making good choices (there's a difference).  I try very hard to never say you're a bad kid, but you're making a bad choice/bad behavior, so we'll see how this all turns out in 20 something years.  Can't wait to see if Jack talks about Santa and how he tried to be a good kid and self worth and all that with his therapist.  Ha!

Alright, tell me in the comments your thoughts on the Elf on the Shelf and Santa and parenting in the comments below, and I hope everyone has a Merry Happy Christmas Holidays!